help wit oc'ing

I've oc'ed my system a bit (specs below) and need some help. I oc'ed my cpu to 204*10 (2040mhz) and would like some info on oc'ing ram. I read somewhere that you have to sometimes change your memory settings to oc ur cpu more. Is this true or was it someone just yappin away? If it is true, can someone give me some links to read or explain to me what the settings mean (ie ras to cas) and how to find my memory's G-spot! Also it seems Im stuck at a 10x multi, i tried using 204*10.5 and it froze during 3DMark03. I'm trying to get it up to a 3200+ (read in a couple magazines where it was done Probably hard with air cooling but ill try anyways). Lastly I know that upping the vcore increases stability, but what's the limit on upping it. I don't want to ruin my mobo or cpu. Im idling at bout 41-44C (49C under load) wit a system temp of bout 25c. Seems a bit high for me though, ima try to reapply some more AS3 tp bring it down a couple degrees.

thanks for any help

in my bios heres the settings under my memory

Row Active Delay = 9
CAS = 3.0
Ras to Cas = 4
Row Per Charge Delay = 4

I know what Ras is, and i know what Ras to Cas is, I'm confused about what Row Active Delay and Row Per Charge Delay mean. If anyone can tell me what these mean I'd appreciate it. I think Row Active Delay is equivalent to RAS, but I'm not certain. Any help id appreciate.

Thanks