If you buy a good motherboard, then yes, you'll probably get a good NIC Chipset.
It really depends on the person, if they are pinching pennies for networking, then they can buy the cheap onboard for about the same price of a no-onboard NIC board. If they are looking to network worth their weight in bandwidth, they'll go buy a top of the line 3COM PCI server NIC.
In the beginning of onboard NICs, they used to only include crap onboard, as they still had to compete with the competitors, who had nothing onboard.
As far as system resource usage goes, if the PCI NIC has no onboard processing capabilities (as most cheap ones don't...especially Realtek) it will use no less resources than an onboard will. [/B]
Essentially, yes, cheap NICs, or almost anything built on Realtek chips will eat the same amount of resouces, it's like the WinModem of NICs. However, any better cards will take all load off the processor, and the only load the processor will see is offloading it to the PCI bus.
As for opinnions, I prefer offboard NICs (as I have seen oh-so-many die, I actually replaced about 12 dead ones just yesterday, incl. 3com's). It's alot easier than RMAing 12 motherboards
Also, if you look at any integrated system that integrates video, nic and sound onboard, and compare it to the same system with those 3 offboard, you will see the performance jump.. the offboard one will be faster (mainly b/c the onboard video sucks ram and CPU like a mofo).