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The Last-Ditch Attempt Saloon

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Old 04-12-08, 11:12 PM Thread Starter   #1
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The Last-Ditch Attempt Saloon


I left Chicago... and America... and the Western Hemisphere... for a lot of different reasons. I wrote about a lot of them in my first book "Halos," and... when I'm feeling patriotic, I like to tell people (especially Europeans) that it was due to a change in some form of elected official.

But 75% of the reason is that Chicago is a horrible place to meet women...

...let me clarify:

Chicago is, was, and has ALWAYS been a horrible place for ME to meet women.

If you're the kind of guy who wears a baseball hat... or can't count past nine... or if you're a girl... then Chicago is an EXCELLENT place to meet women. If you don't fall into any of the above categories... then you're in serious trouble.

Because... while most of the city has been surrendered to a bunch of hipsters transplanted from the suburbs, all looking like, dressing like, and pretending that they ARE Michael Stivic (http://www.geocities.com/rfgold/imag...vic-3.jpg)from All in the Family... we still have Clark Street open to the kegger-toting, "can't get to ten" crowd.

But there isn't any place for I, or most of my friends (on both the male and female side of the spectrum) to meet people.

I spend a lot of time talking to women now that I'm back here... but it's mostly just to keep up practice and prove that I still can. I don't ask for anybody's number or try to go out with anybody these days. I haven't met anybody who I've WANTED to have more information on since I moved back here.

And I basically created this thread to find out what it's like where you live. Of course all you married folks(*cough*nerdlogic*coughcough*xerofan*), over six foot tall airforce guys *cough*TommyHolly*cough*, and bots *cough*Oni*cough*, need not apply.

But what does the last bar open at 5am look like where you are?

Speaking of which... that reminds me of a story...

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Old 04-12-08, 11:21 PM   #2
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If you like to talk to women or even see them, dont come to lompoc.

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Old 04-12-08, 11:31 PM Thread Starter   #3
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Quote:
Originally Posted by cabose1227 View Post
If you like to talk to women or even see them, dont come to lompoc.
I'll make that a point.

"80 miles to the next gas station after this..."

"What exit is it?"

"Lompoc."

"KEEP GOIN'! We can make it!"

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Old 04-12-08, 11:31 PM   #4
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Wow. I can feel the love here, Rainless. It runs deep.

I wear a baseball cap. There's no logo on it, I don't wear it to the side, but I have been known to wear it backwards on occasion. I guess I fall into one of the '******' subgroups anyways.

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Old 04-12-08, 11:38 PM   #5
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In Indy, if a bar is open till 5AM, odds are you are going to run into a bunch of wannabe gangstas/stupid sportsmen and get shot in the ass. Need I say more...

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Old 04-12-08, 11:43 PM   #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rainless View Post
I'll make that a point.

"80 miles to the next gas station after this..."

"What exit is it?"

"Lompoc."

"KEEP GOIN'! We can make it!"
lol

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Old 04-12-08, 11:48 PM Thread Starter   #7
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Originally Posted by Oni View Post
Wow. I can feel the love here, Rainless. It runs deep.

I wear a baseball cap. There's no logo on it, I don't wear it to the side, but I have been known to wear it backwards on occasion. I guess I fall into one of the '******' subgroups anyways.
Hey! Didn't you read through my coughs?!? I already exluded you... but come on down to Chicago and get yourself a woman anyway.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Super Nade View Post
In Indy, if a bar is open till 5AM, odds are you are going to run into a bunch of wannabe gangstas/stupid sportsmen and get shot in the ass. Need I say more...
Ya know... I've been to Indy. In fact, I was visiting this lady friend of mine who was going to some college called Richard's... think it was on the Ohio/Indy or Kentucky/Indy border.

So we drove down to Indianapolis because we figured "Hell! It's the damned capital!"

Heh... funny thing about that...

First gas station we stopped in. There was kind of a young, hip looking guy behind the counter:

"Where's the nearest club?"

"CLUB?!?!"

"......yeah. Club."

He looked genuinely shocked. He was taken aback! I think he literally took two steps back! Started rubbing his chin and looking at the ground. Then he started rubbing his neck. Rubbed his stomach for a while. I think he was hungry...

He sent us to this one place, where it was five bucks to get in and the guy at the door seemed like he was REALLY in a hurry to take our coats... turned out to be a gay bar (we saw the BALCONY full of guys with no shirts and a pink flag just in time).

The next three or four places we stopped (in about a 20 mile radius) were also gay bars.

Finally, as we were just about to give up, we found a place with some women hanging around outside. It was five bucks to get in there too but at least we knew it wasn't a gay bar.

...turned out to be a lesbian bar.

Oh well... At least they had buffalo wings.

So much for Indiana.

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Old 04-13-08, 12:36 AM   #8
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If we in Springfield could evict Chicago, we would. And they can keep "their" governor.

Most bars in Springfield close at 1AM. A few, mostly ones owned by the mayor's brother (go figure), have 3AM licenses. I am over 30 and my work ends at 1AM, so I am not remembering the last time I was in one of the bars...
Since I work downtown where most of the bars are I get to try to run over drunks in about 30 minutes.
Springfield is a little odd as far as nightlife goes. The vast majority of the population works for the government in some form, mostly in a 8-5 shift. Nightlife is pretty tame and dominated by the under 25 crowd. There is a bar that is very easy to take home a woman from, but I would not want to. You might want to keep the lights off and Had to moderate myself.
Personally, I do not want to meet women at a bar or club. Usually not the type of girl I am interested in.

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Old 04-13-08, 01:19 AM Thread Starter   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ridenow View Post
If we in Springfield could evict Chicago, we would. And they can keep "their" governor.

Most bars in Springfield close at 1AM. A few, mostly ones owned by the mayor's brother (go figure), have 3AM licenses. I am over 30 and my work ends at 1AM, so I am not remembering the last time I was in one of the bars...
Since I work downtown where most of the bars are I get to try to run over drunks in about 30 minutes.
Springfield is a little odd as far as nightlife goes. The vast majority of the population works for the government in some form, mostly in a 8-5 shift. Nightlife is pretty tame and dominated by the under 25 crowd. There is a bar that is very easy to take home a woman from, but I would not want to. You might want to keep the lights off and Had to moderate myself.
Personally, I do not want to meet women at a bar or club. Usually not the type of girl I am interested in.
I suppose you're right... but then where do you meet women?

In Paris it was pretty damned easy. I'd trip over women on the way to the bathroom... in my own apartment... literally! Women at the supermarket, on the train, at parties that were constantly going on all year round... any place BUT bars... though you could meet women at bars that would invite you to parties where you could meet OTHER women.

But here? No way. No where.

It's not that Chicago women are unapproachable... they're just psychotic. First thing they'd probably think is you were trying to mug them... in most cases they might be right... but not about ME! I've met women in better places. Met one in a bookstore just a couple months back... she was from Iran and living with her boyfriend/fiancee/husband.

But she liked me and gave me her number, email address, mailing address, and all the contact info for where she worked.

She's exactly what I mean when I think about "The Dating Scene" here in Chicago: Every attractive, intelligent, compatible woman in Chicago is either: Married, has a boyfriend (*whom she's living with), isn't heterosexual, died in the early fifties.

That's why I don't even bother now. I grew up in this town. I left this town and got to travel to places where the ratio of single women to men was 3-1 or greater. I KNOW what a scam Chicago is.

The other side is I may be too jaded for a relationship right now anyway. Not too jaded for sex... but too jaded to LOOK for someone to have sex with. (Not that this has been a problem... plenty of women willing to travel to Chicago.)

There's just so many advantages to going out with someone who lives in the town you live in. I could accomplish so much MORE. I'm not really motivated to do much on my own besides work (shooting videos, editing, directing plays, sound and light, designing websites, etc), write, and play video games.

I have a buddy who's a programmer. He met his girlfriend of three years (a web designer) at work. She plays video games and likes staying at home and ordering a bunch of food for delivery. AND she's good looking! He just stumbled ass-backwards into her in the most clumsy and ridiculous manner possible.

So where does the self-made small business owner meet someone like that?

Sigh... I guess I'll just have to hurry up and finish this second book. Maybe meet someone at the signing at Borders downtown.

I can tell you from life-long experience: It's always easier (though not always better) when there's a girl out there somewhere trying to find out how to meet YOU.

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Old 04-13-08, 02:23 PM   #10
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you know, i think its best to avoid any town along interstate 5 on the west coast, just to add to the lompoc list

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Old 04-13-08, 02:31 PM   #11
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Santa barbara is prety good though, whenever I get the chance thats were I am.

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Old 04-13-08, 02:39 PM   #12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Niku-Sama View Post
you know, i think its best to avoid any town along interstate 5 on the west coast, just to add to the lompoc list
Is Washington state considered the west coast? Most of our happening places are alongside I-5.

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Old 04-13-08, 05:33 PM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rainless View Post
I'll make that a point.

"80 miles to the next gas station after this..."

"What exit is it?"

"Lompoc."

"KEEP GOIN'! We can make it!"
Seriously.

I live in Camarillo. It sucks. We go to Santa Barbara for "action", if that is what you're in to. The nice part of C-town is that one can sleep very, very well if you want to...at night, anyway. The neighbor's gardener's leafblower prevents me from sleeping during the day.

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Old 04-13-08, 05:40 PM Thread Starter   #14
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Captain Newbie View Post
Seriously.

I live in Camarillo. It sucks. We go to Santa Barbara for "action", if that is what you're in to. The nice part of C-town is that one can sleep very, very well if you want to...at night, anyway. The neighbor's gardener's leafblower prevents me from sleeping during the day.
Hooray! "Sleeping well"!

I've gotta book a ticket!

Wouldn't work for me. I sleep during the day...

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Old 04-13-08, 05:47 PM   #15
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Is it really that bad in Chicago? I was just just planning to go to a club or something...

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Old 04-13-08, 05:50 PM   #16
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LA is pretty good, I must say. When I was in the dating scene, I never had an issue getting a date. My friend that lives closest to me always has girls coming in and out of his apartment. I swear, he's too much! LOL
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Old 04-13-08, 06:55 PM   #17
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Quote:
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Hooray! "Sleeping well"!

I've gotta book a ticket!

Wouldn't work for me. I sleep during the day...
I meant it in the literal, not figurative/"good" sense.

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Old 04-13-08, 10:46 PM   #18
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Why not try NYC? Almost EVERYTHING is open 24/7. I feel like i could go outside and get anything i wanted at any time of the day or night. Also it is a HUGE city and there are good looking people everywhere. If you aren't into the whole hipster look stay far away from Brooklyn, specifically Williamsburg and Park Slope. Coincidentally most of the writers and artists and that sort of people live in the Park Slope area.

There are clubs, bars, cafes, and bookstores always open ready for you to meet women in.

Maybe i just like NYC a lot and i feel this way. I am currently stuck in the boonies of Western MA for college and i am only back in NY during the breaks.

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Old 04-13-08, 10:53 PM   #19
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Well, in southwest Connecticut, it is mostly about which cliques you are part of.

All bars must close at 1:00 (2:00 on Saturday) and in the downtown area, the police literally roll up the sidewalks right then. Seriously, every bar puts the lights on full at 12:45 and if you are not gone in ten minutes, you will hear the jukebox playing Red Peters “Get the **** outta here”. Then there is a choreographed deal with around 30 police cars to get everyone moving.

Obviously, the only effect that this brings is to move the general party elsewhere. Where you go depends on whom you are connected to. Being on the state line, that can be one of a few places and varies with your current group. Pretty much, the party moves with the state of the zeitgeist. Usually, I go with whomever I happen to be talking to at that moment.

As far as picking up the chixxors, again, it goes by whom you are hooked up with. If you want to go home with some random drunk, you have as much of a choice as you had to drink with before stuff closed.
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Old 04-14-08, 12:31 AM   #20
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I know what you mean Rainless... To actually meet some chick that is dating material in a bar is really hard. But I have had good luck in places like supermarkets (especially Trader Joes) and restuarants or just walking down state street. Overall, I think the Chicago dating scene is decent, not spectacular but pretty good.

But yeah, the best ones are usually married or something is wrong (like they are really hot and reeeeeeeally crazy, LOL) I had really good luck with the whole internet dating thing for a while but that was just for a hook up and not anyone that I'd actually date for more then a week. I am currently dating someone I met off the internet but it was a hassle dealing with all the liars, scammers, and crazies to find one or two good ones. The dating scene is pretty much the same anywhere I've been no matter what town, state, or even country. Some of my best relationships were completely random meetings, (on the train to Brussels from Germany, in a hotel at breakfast in Springfield IL., Air Force tech school...) Some of the best way I get dates is through friends of friends or neighbors who know I'm single that '*****' me out, haha. They tell me "oh you just got to meet 'so and so'...she is single and really beautiful and I think you two would get along great!"

By the way, have you been to Springfield? I go down there once a month and I love it! Ask Ridenow what's it like if you don't believe me, I have alot of fun there.

My biggest problem with the mid-west in general is:
1. The women tend to be overweight and they think that they are way hotter then they really are.
2. Many of them are brainwashed to get married asap and live the fairytale princess lifestyle that is owed to them because of (insert idiotic reason here)

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