EULA: Extremely Unsavory Loathsome Actions. . .

When is a virus not a virus? When it’s part of a marketing campaign.

Essentially, some electronic greeting card company offers you a card, but to see it, you click off on a EULA and essentially agree to spam all your contacts for them.

This is low. This is getting out of control.

Admittedly, this is fairly harmless but I can think of far nastier variations on this theme. More and more chunks of whale feces out there think they can get you to sign your life away through a click-through EULA, and while outrageous provisions would not doubt be tossed out in court, there’s a lot of people out there people who aren’t legally aware enough to realize that.

A deeper concern is that government just can’t act fast enough to effectively react to this. Bad enough when it comes to illegal matters, but when the “legal” ones get just about as bad, then what do you do?

In the last six-nine months, my email has exploded with unwanted messages. I’m good for at least ten messages a day that contain viruses. At least two or three a day want me to help out some down-on-his-luck Third World guy steal money–mine. And an unconscionable number of people now want me to upgrade my penis, without even offering to date me afterwards.

I can hardly tell the difference between my trash bin and the real bin anymore.

That’s the problem with absolute freedom, it frees not only the good, but also the evil spirits. Yes, we’ve always had human feces, but the Internet frees them to dump global diarrhea upon us all.

I heard Satan was opening up a new section of hell. In it, you can’t leave your machine, you get more popups than webpages, all the people you run across are asses, and all your email is spam.

Hmmm, not so much different than what we’re getting now.


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