this has gotto be the stupist articale ive ever seen!

[deathstar13]

http://www.chasten.org/hacker.htm

3. Has your child asked for new hardware?

Computer hackers are often limited by conventional computer hardware. They may request "faster" video cards, and larger hard drives, or even more memory. If your son starts requesting these devices, it is possible that he has a legitimate need. You can best ensure that you are buying legal, trustworthy hardware by only buying replacement parts from your computer's manufacturer.

If your son has requested a new "processor" from a company called "AMD", this is genuine cause for alarm. AMD is a third-world based company who make inferior, "knock-off" copies of American processor chips. They use child labor extensively in their third world sweatshops, and they deliberately disable the security features that American processor makers, such as Intel, use to prevent hacking. AMD chips are never sold in stores, and you will most likely be told that you have to order them from internet sites. Do not buy this chip! This is one request that you must refuse your son, if you are to have any hope of raising him well.

bad part thats only part of the stupity. its worth a laugh tho.
isnt amd in california?
and is germany a third would country?
i think i bought my tbred in a pc store also.
lol i dont even have the time to add more.

 

[Thelemac]

Haha, this one again?

I'm pretty sure it was determined to be a joke

 

[Frodo Baggins]

wow, is it a joke? if it isn't...i'm getting a bit sick...yeesh

 

[deathstar13]

oh well was it posted before? is so just nuke it pls!
first time ive seen it. sorry :S

 

[mbentley]

thanks for the good laugh that was the most ridiculous thing i have ever heard in my life. haha watch out for those AMD chips that they make in sweatshops... you know kids these days... they can do just about anything who needs years of education to make chips when you can use a sweatshop full of kids?

(by the way, i am kidding about the sweatshops)

 

[Breadfan]

LOL, yeah, I need a Radeon 9700 pro so my internet loads faster.

And who had the quote from a stupid customer that was something to the effect of : "Uh, does this thing have the internet loaded on it?"

I sure hope that was a joke, ofcourse, the sad part is, if that was on CNN I bet about 70% of the readers would believe the video card bit, and boycott AMD, lol.

Mike

 

[subconcept]

LOL this article again. Always a good laugh. The thing about amd cracks me up. All in all i think the linux stuff is the funniest in there. How its an illeagle hacker os, and you need to get your computer fitted with a new hd from the manufacturer.

I wonder if its a joke or real, iits real hes amazingly stupid.

 

[Thelemac]

oh well was it posted before? is so just nuke it pls!
first time ive seen it. sorry :S

Plenty of people haven't seen it, and it *is* quite amusing.

 

[progamer]

I like the part where it says this. It's too funny:

Even when confronted, your son will probably find it difficult to talk about this problem to you. He will probably claim that there is no problem, and that you are imagining things. He may tell you that it is you who has the problem, and you should "back off" and "stop smothering him." Do not allow yourself to be deceived. You are the only chance your son has, even if he doesn't understand the situation he is in. Keep trying to get through to him, no matter how much he retreats into himself.



Hopefully, parents who read this won't take it seriously.

 

[MajinSSJVegetto]

This one is always a good laugh.


edit; This isn't the true version of it.

If you go to it, it has 960 comments.
Months ago when I viewed it, it had over 5 thousand posts.

 

[CPFitz14]

6. Does your son use Quake?

Quake is an online virtual reality used by hackers. It is a popular meeting place and training ground, where they discuss hacking and train in the use of various firearms. Many hackers develop anti-social tendencies due to the use of this virtual world, and it may cause erratic behaviour at home and at school.

It also said that your son may be a hacker if he spends more than 30 minutes a day on the computer. Well, guess i'm a hacker, as well as everyone else on these forums

 

[bubba gump]

lol, first time ive seen this


I just really love how they spell Linux.....Lunix...lmfao

8. Is your son obsessed with "Lunix"?

BSD, Lunix, Debian and Mandrake are all versions of an illegal hacker operation system, invented by a Soviet computer hacker named Linyos Torovoltos, before the Russians lost the Cold War. It is based on a program called "xenix", which was written by Microsoft for the US government. These programs are used by hackers to break into other people's computer systems to steal credit card numbers. They may also be used to break into people's stereos to steal their music, using the "mp3" program. Torovoltos is a notorious hacker, responsible for writing many hacker programs, such as "telnet", which is used by hackers to connect to machines on the internet without using a telephone.

Your son may try to install "lunix" on your hard drive. If he is careful, you may not notice its presence, however, lunix is a capricious beast, and if handled incorrectly, your son may damage your computer, and even break it completely by deleting Windows, at which point you will have to have your computer repaired by a professional.

If you see the word "LILO" during your windows startup (just after you turn the machine on), your son has installed lunix. In order to get rid of it, you will have to send your computer back to the manufacturer, and have them fit a new hard drive. Lunix is extremely dangerous software, and cannot be removed without destroying part of your hard disk surface.

lol, this is grand...uber grand


Edit: eep, just noticed Lunix, is a right word....DONT FLAME MY n00BNESS! /me bows down in fear

 

[eli]

I didn't know Quake was a training ground for internet terrorists!

That would make me a terrorist for 5 years now...

 

[mbentley]

lEdit: eep, just noticed Lunix, is a right word....DONT FLAME MY n00BNESS! /me bows down in fear

don't worry bubba... no flaming here (at least not from me ) i thought the same thing the first time i saw "lunix" i was thinking that someone just couldn't type well... my roommate who just read that as well thought the same thing... so you're not the only one who didn't know about lunix at some point or another

 

[ThePerfectCore]

Geesh. Whoever wrote this needs to be brutally shot. Who knows how many young, great minds ignorant parents have hampered and choked because of this God damn useless article.

I know it's a joke, but the fact that there are morons that would actually believe it **** me off to no end.

 

[mbentley]

true... that's pretty bad if people actually believe this! i guess that just shows how much the public is misinformed about a great deal of things... that is why people like us will have jobs for a long time (as long as your career is computers) there will always be someone else who doesn't know what they are doing

 

[Namagomi]

lol, that's funny. have you heard the one about the "All your base are belong to us" game? Hahah!

Anyways, I'm glad you found that article. Welcome to last year.
And if it is any consolation, Adequacy.org is now dead. Long live kuro5hin.org!

 

[ThePerfectCore]

Namagomi, FYI, I live about 65 miles from you. Do you listen to RMS?

To everyone else - I found this: http://www.digerat.com/inadequacyhacker.htm

It's a short analysis of the article. The guy actually made sense until he wrote this:

Some real warning signs:

Large MP3 collections of songs you don't own.

Frequent Visits to Warez Sitez

A large Stash of Porn

Password Hackers on your computer

If your Child is getting in to piracy and hacking it is likely your computer will get a virus. Piracy is like prostitution, you do it long enough you are bound to get caught or catch something.

I have *alot* of MP3s - nearly 11GBs - and I know jack **** about "hacking" anything. WTF does music have to do with hacking, anyway?

I have alot to argue about with his warez comment, since it could go either way - but I will only acknowledge his saying it, and not argue about it. Don't want to make a few mods explode, takes forever to mop up the mess.

Name me one person on this board who hasn't kept a bit of porn on their machine for at least a little while.

Password "hackers" full under the warez column - it's there, but I'm not going to talk about it. The rest of his comments are the same way, save the very last sentence:

If you have genuine concerns get together with your schools guidance counselor and a Technology Specialist (some one truly in the know like a University instructor or a computer security specialist).

I sure hope he doesn't run into my old high school's "Technology Specialist".

 

[Ghost68]

Name me one person on this board who hasn't kept a bit of porn on their machine for at least a little while.

 

[deathstar13]

wont find no pron on mine. just a little letter "p" with some bookmarks under it.but nutten stored.