My Wife is the queen of quiet.
Yeah I would say under 20dB is what you want.
Get a good Fan in a good PSU running low speed,
get a large HS on your CPU with no fan, make sure your PSU
has a fan on the bottom to pull the heat out anf off the CPU.
and there you go, a 20dB or less system. however htere will be no OverClocking for you, you also have to get a Board that doesnt use a NB cooler or a Video card that has a GPU cooler.
and if you want good graphics the Zalaman silent cooler, its big but it does work.
however those are the extreams, 30dB is still good for most people which is what I think some Dell's come as,
they only have two fans, one in the PSU, and another in the back with a deflector on the CPU HS too cool it off.
for the rest of us 40-60dB baby, not sure what mine range is.
I have eight high speed fans in my system, most are 80mm 50CFM fans, so im not on the quiet side. and yes my wife hates my system, says its too loud, and sounds like a jet taking off. so im looking into Watercooling to please her ears. its wont be quiet but it will be quieter then its at.
-L_P