One Box To Rule Them All

We had to expect this.

Microsoft will introduce XBox2, not at some trade show, but on MTV.

Talk about an infomercial:

“The special will feature never-before-seen, action-packed gameplay of future Xbox games, a peek into the future of the Xbox LiveTM online gaming service, backstage celebrity interviews and exclusive insider footage on the making of the next-generation console.”

Is this a computer or a movie? “Celebrity interviews?” I just can’t wait for Christina’s or Justin’s or Beyonce’s profound technical insights into the machine!

But wait, there is a designated celebrity expert, someone that everyone will instinctively know must know everything about computers: Frodo (aka Elijah Wood).

Whooaaaa, now I’m impressed!!! A hobbit hobbyist! I know I’m going to get the lowdown now!!

Now I have the inside scoop on how Frodo really got to Mordor! He just plugged in his XBox2 (lots of electrical plugs in those Middle Earth forests), and used WiFi to get directions!!

That’s not even the bad part, though.

Frodo Sells Out

I really don’t think Microsoft thought this one out.

After all, what is Frodo known for? Frodo is known for travelling across Middle Earth to destroy the One Ring, a ring of absolute power that would allow Sauron, the dark lord of Mordor, to rule and enslave Middle Earth.

Many would argue that this talk of an evil enslaving power sounds an awful lot like Microsoft, and a saying like, “One ring to rule them all, and in the darkness bind them,” is pretty close to their operational motto.

Like some spells in LOTR, there are some things better left alone.

For those inclined to think that way, having Elijah Wood shilling for Microsoft is going to look an awful lot like Frodo pimping for Sauron.

Not good. Not too bright, Redmond.

Granted, most watching this won’t make that kind of connection, but for those who do, that MTV show may be unintentionally hilarious. Besides that, though, in the long run, selling a computer like a movie is hardly going to help those who want steak rather than sizzle.