(apologies to John 20)
Then the same day in Tunisia, being the second day of the week, when the doors were shut where the disciples were assembled for fear of the C2Ds, came
Jesus Derrick and stood in the midst, and saith unto them, “Pieces I bring unto you.”
And when he had so said, he shewed unto them his Barcelonas and Agena FXs, and even 65nm R600s, with copies of selected benchmarks. Then were the disciples glad, when they saw the Lord.
Then said Derrick to them again, “Pieces I have brought unto you: as Father Hector hath sent me, even so send I you.”
And when he had said this, he breathed on them, and saith unto them, “Receive ye the AMD Spirit.”
Derrick then said unto them, “Publish these not, for I have not yet cleared the NDA with my Father, but go to my brethren and say unto them, “We have seen the Lord and He has done mighty works.”
But another reviewer was not with them when Derrick came.
The other disciples therefore said unto him, “We have seen the Lord and He has done mighty works.” But he said unto them, “Except I shall see with my own eyes the FPS scores, and put my fingers onto the keyboard to run my benchmarks, and thrust my hand into His case to count the memory sticks, I will not believe.”
And after some days again his disciples were within, along with the analysts and shareholders at the annual meeting, and the reviewer with them: then came Derrick, the doors being shut, and stood in the midst, and said, “Pieces I bring unto you.”
Then saith he to the reviewer, Reach hither thy fingers, and behold my FPS scores and other benchmarks; and reach hither thy hand, and thrust it into my case, and be not faithless, but believing.”
And the reviewer and the analysts and the rest answered and said unto him, “My Lord and my God.”
Derrick saith unto them, “Because thou hast seen these, thou hast believed: blessed are they that have not seen, and yet have believed.”